How to reframe unhelpful thoughts to help you reach a healthy weight

Published December 2025 | 5 min read
Expert contributor: Glenn Mackintosh, psychologist, Weight Management Psychology
Words by Sabrina Rogers-Anderson

Making a few simple mindset shifts and adopting positive self-talk can help you achieve – and maintain – a healthy weight.

Have you ever started a health journey, only to hit a setback a few days in and think, “I’ve already failed this week, so I’ll start fresh on Monday”? Or maybe you feel there’s no time in your busy schedule to exercise or cook nutritious meals – especially after a long, stressful day.

Weight management is important for many reasons. Being a healthy weight can improve sleep, boost energy and support mental wellbeing. It also contributes to healthy blood pressure and cholesterol, reduces joint strain, and lowers the risk of type 2 diabetes, heart disease, stroke and certain cancers.

But negative self-talk can hold you back from achieving your goals. Although diet programs that promise quick results might seem appealing, many aren’t sustainable over the long term. When you inevitably regain the weight, you blame yourself for your lack of willpower and sign up to the program again – and so the cycle continues.

But you and your willpower aren’t the problem. A major international review of 14 popular diet programs found any weight reduction people achieved had mostly disappeared 12 months later.

So, how can you step off this merry-go-round and achieve a healthy weight that lasts? According to a weight management psychologist, positive self-talk and simple mindset shifts can help you reach your goals.

How self-talk affects weight management

If you’ve ever told yourself you’re a failure or used other negative self-talk when you haven’t achieved your weight goals, you’re not alone. But being hard on yourself can affect your mental health and self-esteem – and it may also make it harder to achieve and maintain a healthy weight.

Research has shown that people who are taught self-compassion skills while trying to manage their weight are kinder to themselves during the process and may see improvements in their eating behaviours and body weight.

“How you talk to yourself affects your actions and how you feel about your actions,” says psychologist Glenn Mackintosh, founder of Weight Management Psychology. “You need to work on changing your inner dialogue.”

5 common negative thoughts and how to reframe them

While negative self-talk is common, you can learn how to reframe your unhelpful thoughts and develop a more positive mindset towards weight management.

Here are five common negative thoughts and how to overcome them.

1. I don’t have time to exercise

Many people fall into the trap of thinking a workout has to be a certain length – perhaps an hour – otherwise it doesn’t count. So, if they can’t make time for a full hour, they simply don’t do it.

Mindset shift: “If you tell yourself that any movement you do is good for your body, or ‘If I move, I win’, you’ll be more likely to fit it in when you can, even if it’s just a 15-minute walk,” says Glenn. “With that mindset, you’ll be more likely to feel good about any movement you do and celebrate it, which will help you sustain those changes over time.”

2. I need to avoid ‘bad’ foods at all costs

This type of black-and-white thinking can lead to overeating and shame that derails you from your weight management goals.

“If you perceive certain foods like chocolate as ‘bad’ and judge yourself for eating them, you may create what’s called the ‘forbidden fruit effect’ and want them more,” says Glenn.

“Or you may eat them anyway and have what we call the ‘what the hell’ effect where you tell yourself, ‘Well, I stuffed my diet for the day, so I’m just going to eat whatever I want’. Or even ‘I’ve stuffed it for the week, so I’ll start again on Monday’.”

Mindset shift: Instead of good or bad, try reframing food items as ‘anytime foods’ (like fruits, vegetables and whole grains) and ‘sometimes foods’ (like sugary and deep-fried fare). By allowing yourself small portions of ‘sometimes foods’, you’re less likely to overindulge and go back to your old eating habits.

Eligible HCF members can get free access or save on the cost of the evidence-based CSIRO Total Wellbeing Diet^*, which can help to support you to make sustainable dietary changes.

3. I’m a failure because I can’t lose weight

In a society that idealises thinness and stigmatises being overweight, this belief is all too common, says Glenn.

“People used to think that shaming others about their weight would motivate them to change, but weight stigma almost always backfires,” he explains. “People who feel shame about their bodies are more likely to follow unrealistic diets and to overeat. They’re also less likely to exercise, especially in public, or to see a health professional for help.”

Mindset shift: “A successful health and weight management journey requires you to shift not only your attitude towards eating, exercise and self-care, but also your attitude towards your body and yourself,” says Glenn.

HCF’s mental health programs^{^} give eligible members quick and easy access to a range of options so you can choose which is right for you. They include a free annual online HealthyMinds Check-in with a psychologist and extras cover for online cognitive behavioural therapy through THIS WAY UP.

4. I’m not seeing fast results, so it’s not working

The quick results many dieting programs promise can be motivating, but they usually don’t last because their restrictive methods aren’t sustainable in the long term.

Mindset shift: “My approach is a very slow, almost underwhelming behaviour change process,” says Glenn. “Then a year or two down the track, people look back and think, ‘Woah, look at all this progress I’ve made with small, sustainable steps’, and by then it’s just their way of life.”

5. I deserve a treat after a hard day

Emotional eating – using food as comfort or to deal with feelings – is a common coping mechanism. But, notes Glenn, there’s no nutritional solution to an emotional problem.

Mindset shift: Glenn says it’s important to ask yourself what you really need and want when you reach for a treat. “By digging a little deeper, you may realise you don’t actually want a block of chocolate, but you want to reconnect with your partner or you’re unhappy at work,” he says.

“Rather than ‘I deserve ice cream’, you can learn to reframe it as, ‘I deserve to feel calm at the end of my work day’. By looking at your real wants and needs, you’ll come to understand that while food may temporarily make you feel a bit better and distract you from your problems, it won’t solve them.”

Get help with your weight goals

Carrying extra weight can affect your health – with weight-bearing joints like the knees and hips taking a lot of the strain. That’s why we offer a range of programs to support members in managing their weight and improving joint health. Learn more about our Healthy Weight for Life Osteoarthritis and other joint health programs⁺.